Kathy’s Books
Appearances
As seen on the weekly Love & Marriage segment of Fox8
As heard co-hosting Relationship Thursdays on Q104
As seen as a guest relationship expert on iVillage.com
NEW! Listen to Kathy's 2-part interview with Trapper Jack and the Morning Show.
Part 1 Part 2Kathy Dawson is a member of the International Coach Federation
Drama – Free Vacations!
Is it possible to have a drama-free summer vacation? I answered that question during an appearance on Channel 3′s Good Company Show this morning. I made several suggestions to help you and your mate (with or without kids) reduce drama during your trip.
- Meet as a couple or as a family at least one week before your vacation to make sure you are on the same page in the following areas:
- Be clear on your vacation “theme.” Is the theme of your vacation relaxation or activity? If it’s a mix of both, be sure to understand how much relaxation and activity each person wants.
- Talk about your food expectations. How much fine dining do you want to do? Do you want to cook on vacation? Would you rather dine casually the entire time?
- Will this be a techno-free vacation or will you be bringing your laptop or Blackberry?
- Have an exit plan. Make sure you exit your home to leave for your vacation in as calm and orderly way as possible. How you leave your home sets the tone for traveling.
- If you are driving, avoid arguing while your motor vehicle is in motion! If you feel an argument coming on, pull over.
- Have had a discussion with your mate in advance as to what your budget is for the trip. What you agree to spend on the vacation may help determine the trip’s theme and dining decisions.
BON VOYAGE!
In the Doghouse
Today in Cleveland’s Plain Dealer, Michael Heaton talks about how guys can avoid landing in the doghouse. He states two basic ways men can avoid getting into big, big trouble with their significant others. Way #1 is to initiate a call to their mate when they know they are going to be late or have to change plans. Immobilized in fear that they will get “yelled at,” guys often avoid being proactive. Wrong move! Heaton is right when he says that calling asap with a change in plans is the best choice a man can make.
Heaton says Way #2 for a guy to stay out of the doghouse is for him to admit when he’s made a mistake. Bingo! If a guy screws up and says, “I was wrong,” he automatically ratchets up his trustworthiness and integrity .
Alone and Liking It
My husband went out of town this last weekend, leaving me alone with our dog, Rosie. It felt weird without him around for a couple of days. During the weekend, we usually work out together, stop for coffee and run errands. Saturday nights are often spent going out to dinner, theater, or dancing.
Although I missed his company, I really liked the feeling of hanging with myself. I spent time reading, working out alone, and cooking. I thought of him often, yet enjoyed the feeling of being separated for a short time. During his absence, balance was being restored and a new sense of longing was being revived.
It was wonderful to see him walk through the door on Sunday, partly because I had missed him, but partly because I felt good about the time I had spent with myself.
Do You Fight or Argue?
As a guest on Cleveland’s Trapper Jack in the Morning Show (WDOK 102.1) this morning, I talked about fighting fairly. The first thing I said was I didn’t like the word “fight.” I explained that although it makes for great radio, it carries with it a load of negative energy and connotations. Yes, words have energy!
Granted, if you and someone are pummeling each other with your fists, you’re having a fight. But most of the time when people argue, they are strongly disagreeing, which by the way is normal! As soon as you bring the word “fight” into it, it shrouds the situation with what I believe to be an unproductive tone.
When you are in conflict with someone and you make it clear that you strongly disagree with him or her, you automatically set a parameter around the interaction. In essence, you are telling the person you are putting away your boxing gloves. Leave fighting for the ring.
