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Appearances
As seen on the weekly Love & Marriage segment of Fox8
As heard co-hosting Relationship Thursdays on Q104
As seen as a guest relationship expert on iVillage.com
NEW! Listen to Kathy's 2-part interview with Trapper Jack and the Morning Show.
Part 1 Part 2Kathy Dawson is a member of the International Coach Federation
Say Yes to Pre-Marital Coaching!
It warms my heart to see how many couples are coming into my office lately for work on their relationship before considering marriage. There is a new mindset growing in our country and it’s got prevention written all over it. Granted, not every problem can be avoided ahead of a marriage, but how you and your mate mishandle a problem can be avoided.
Looking at problems that keep popping up in a relationship is a smart use of energy. Spending time figuring out what part you play in the problem is key to prevention. Humility and accountability are your friends when it comes to facing what you’re doing that’s not working very well. And, yes, your partner must do the same thing!
This past spring and summer I was asked by the producers of a wildly popular reality show on TLC called “Say Yes to the Dress” to coach a couple in preparation for their wedding day and a spin-off special on TLC called “Say Yes to the Dress – The Big Day.” I worked with Kelly Miller and Roger Gasser on 3 separate occasions. By the time our third coaching session was complete (after a fair amount of drama), this couple was ready to tie the knot.
To watch Kelly and Roger’s pre-marital roller coaster ride, be sure to tune into “Say Yes to the Dress – The Big Day” on Friday, Oct. 14th at 10:00PM EST. Check your local listings for possible changes. To learn more about this TLC special, click here.
Why Do I Have to Do Everything?
September’s issue of the national magazine, First for women, features a Cleveland couple, as well as myself as the expert, dealing with the age-old conflict of household chores. Annie and Pat Flaherty, married 14 years, share in this Marriage S.O.S feature of how the lack of balance in who does what around the house almost ended their marriage.
Annie’s perspective of “He doesn’t realize how hard I work” and Pat’s of “She’s not the only one who’s busy” may be something to which, you can relate. My input entitled “The Secret to Ending the Blame Cycle” may give you just the answers you need! To read the article, click here.
Drama – Free Vacations!
Is it possible to have a drama-free summer vacation? I answered that question during an appearance on Channel 3′s Good Company Show this morning. I made several suggestions to help you and your mate (with or without kids) reduce drama during your trip.
- Meet as a couple or as a family at least one week before your vacation to make sure you are on the same page in the following areas:
- Be clear on your vacation “theme.” Is the theme of your vacation relaxation or activity? If it’s a mix of both, be sure to understand how much relaxation and activity each person wants.
- Talk about your food expectations. How much fine dining do you want to do? Do you want to cook on vacation? Would you rather dine casually the entire time?
- Will this be a techno-free vacation or will you be bringing your laptop or Blackberry?
- Have an exit plan. Make sure you exit your home to leave for your vacation in as calm and orderly way as possible. How you leave your home sets the tone for traveling.
- If you are driving, avoid arguing while your motor vehicle is in motion! If you feel an argument coming on, pull over.
- Have had a discussion with your mate in advance as to what your budget is for the trip. What you agree to spend on the vacation may help determine the trip’s theme and dining decisions.
BON VOYAGE!
In the Doghouse
Today in Cleveland’s Plain Dealer, Michael Heaton talks about how guys can avoid landing in the doghouse. He states two basic ways men can avoid getting into big, big trouble with their significant others. Way #1 is to initiate a call to their mate when they know they are going to be late or have to change plans. Immobilized in fear that they will get “yelled at,” guys often avoid being proactive. Wrong move! Heaton is right when he says that calling asap with a change in plans is the best choice a man can make.
Heaton says Way #2 for a guy to stay out of the doghouse is for him to admit when he’s made a mistake. Bingo! If a guy screws up and says, “I was wrong,” he automatically ratchets up his trustworthiness and integrity .
Alone and Liking It
My husband went out of town this last weekend, leaving me alone with our dog, Rosie. It felt weird without him around for a couple of days. During the weekend, we usually work out together, stop for coffee and run errands. Saturday nights are often spent going out to dinner, theater, or dancing.
Although I missed his company, I really liked the feeling of hanging with myself. I spent time reading, working out alone, and cooking. I thought of him often, yet enjoyed the feeling of being separated for a short time. During his absence, balance was being restored and a new sense of longing was being revived.
It was wonderful to see him walk through the door on Sunday, partly because I had missed him, but partly because I felt good about the time I had spent with myself.
