Kathy’s Books
Appearances
As seen on the weekly Love & Marriage segment of Fox8
As heard co-hosting Relationship Thursdays on Q104
As seen as a guest relationship expert on iVillage.com
NEW! Listen to Kathy's 2-part interview with Trapper Jack and the Morning Show.
Part 1 Part 2Kathy Dawson is a member of the International Coach Federation
It’s Tax Time!
Tax time is not known to be one of life’s favorite times of year, however it is a great opportunity for you and your mate to look at your finances thoroughly. Ideally, you and your partner want to have a “financial date” once a quarter, at the very minimum. This is when each of you comes to the table with all of your expenses, debts, assets, investments, and anything else that contributes to your financial picture. Full disclosure is key to having an open and honest financial relationship.
Whether you owe taxes or you are getting a refund for 2009, look at this time of year as an opportunity to shore up and strengthen the relationship you and your mate have around money.
In the Absence of Children
Technically, my husband and I have been empty nesters for almost 4 years now. But somehow we have staved off that all-encompassing void-like feeling that sweeps over you when your last child clears out his or her bedroom. Whether it’s because we talk to our kids regularly or we like to plan the next visit or vacation with them, we haven’t suffered too much of the empty nest blues. Until yesterday. After exchanging our traditional Easter baskets with each other, the highlight of the day was when my husband and I sang happy birthday to our bijon-poo doggie, Rosie ,who turned 4-years-old. Either we’ve hit the empty nest blues or we need a life!
5 Ways to Prevent an Affair
During an appearance on Channel 3′s morning talk show, Good Company, this week I talked about 5 concrete things couples can do to affair-proof their marriage or relationship. Here is the list:
1. Challenge each other to grow. When one person feels the other doesn’t support his or her personal growth, that’s a RED FLAG! Partners have to build each other up – not tear each other down.
2. Spend a consistent amount of quality time together. Humans are not meant to be isolated, especially from someone to whom the are committed.
3. When a problem arises, nip it in the bud by addressing it productively. Build a muscle memory for teamwork.
4. Avoid toxic couples. Hang with couples who make their relationship a priority. Couples can, without realizing it, become like the company they keep.
5. Take a radical step. If you start to feel like you want to have an affair, go to your partner asap and tell him or her. What feeds an affair is secrecy. If you put it out there that it has crossed your mind to have an affair, it will do two things: deflate the mystique of the affair and wake up your mate to the reality that there is a serious problem in your relationship.
Interesting Perspective on Infidelity
I really like what this therapist has to say about infidelity. If you have a chance, I highly recommend you watch the video. The only thing I take issue with is her viewpoint on privacy. In my experience as a relationship coach, when a partner hides an affair that may have occurred years before in hopes that it doesn’t get exposed (which it usually does, eventually), there become two indiscretions: the affair – which is hard enough to deal with – and the fact the person never confessed to it – the compounding factor.
Once you look at the video, let me know what you think by making a comment on my blog!
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/sex-dawn/201003/anti-marriage-counseling
Watch First, Then Dance!
The next season of Dancing with the Stars starts tonight! If you and your mate would like to dance, but have never actually signed up for a lesson, I recommend spending the next couple of months watching Dancing with the Stars. Rather than feeling intimidated (no one is under this much pressure in the real world of dancing) use it to get pumped about learning even the most basic ballroom dance steps. There is nothing more fun and good for your relationship than you and your mate stepping onto a dance floor with the confidence to dance a basic fox trot, salsa, or swing step. A bonus is that dancing is great exercise for your mind and body!
