Kathy Dawson Relationship Coach » Uncategorized

It’s Tax Time!

Kathy Dawson — Wed, 07 Apr 2010 20:30:05 +0000

Tax time is not known to be one of life’s favorite times of year, however it is a great opportunity for you and your mate to look at your finances thoroughly. Ideally, you and your partner want to have a “financial date” once a quarter, at the very minimum. This is when each of you comes to the table with all of your expenses, debts, assets, investments, and anything else that contributes to your financial picture. Full disclosure is key to having an open and honest financial relationship.

Whether you owe taxes or you are getting a refund for 2009, look at this time of year as an opportunity to shore up and strengthen the relationship you and your mate have around money.

In the Absence of Children

Kathy Dawson — Mon, 05 Apr 2010 13:27:47 +0000

Technically, my husband and I have been empty nesters for almost 4 years now. But somehow we have staved off that all-encompassing void-like feeling that sweeps over you when your last child clears out his or her bedroom. Whether it’s because we talk to our kids regularly or we like to plan the next visit or vacation with them, we haven’t suffered too much of the empty nest blues. Until yesterday. After exchanging our traditional Easter baskets with each other, the highlight of the day was when my husband and I sang happy birthday to our bijon-poo doggie, Rosie ,who turned 4-years-old. Either we’ve hit the empty nest blues or we need a life!

5 Ways to Prevent an Affair

Kathy Dawson — Wed, 31 Mar 2010 17:52:59 +0000

During an appearance on Channel 3′s morning talk show, Good Company, this week I talked about 5 concrete things couples can do to affair-proof their marriage or relationship. Here is the list:

1. Challenge each other to grow. When one person feels the other doesn’t support his or her personal growth, that’s a RED FLAG! Partners have to build each other up – not tear each other down.

2. Spend a consistent amount of quality time together. Humans are not meant to be isolated, especially from someone to whom the are committed.

3. When a problem arises, nip it in the bud by addressing it productively. Build a muscle memory for teamwork.

4. Avoid toxic couples. Hang with couples who make their relationship a priority. Couples can, without realizing it, become like the company they keep.

5. Take a radical step. If you start to feel like you want to have an affair, go to your partner asap and tell him or her. What feeds an affair is secrecy. If you put it out there that it has crossed your mind to have an affair, it will do two things: deflate the mystique of the affair and wake up your mate to the reality that there is a serious problem in your relationship.

Interesting Perspective on Infidelity

Kathy Dawson — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 19:40:35 +0000

I really like what this therapist has to say about infidelity. If you have a chance, I highly recommend you watch the video. The only thing I take issue with is her viewpoint on privacy. In my experience as a relationship coach, when a partner hides an affair that may have occurred years before in hopes that it doesn’t get exposed (which it usually does, eventually), there become two indiscretions: the affair – which is hard enough to deal with – and the fact the person never confessed to it – the compounding factor.

Once you look at the video, let me know what you think by making a comment on my blog!

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/sex-dawn/201003/anti-marriage-counseling

Watch First, Then Dance!

Kathy Dawson — Mon, 22 Mar 2010 15:00:25 +0000

The next season of Dancing with the Stars starts tonight! If you and your mate would like to dance, but have never actually signed up for a lesson, I recommend spending the next couple of months watching Dancing with the Stars. Rather than feeling intimidated (no one is under this much pressure in the real world of dancing) use it to get pumped about learning even the most basic ballroom dance steps. There is nothing more fun and good for your relationship than you and your mate stepping onto a dance floor with the confidence to dance a basic fox trot, salsa, or swing step. A bonus is that dancing is great exercise for your mind and body!

Back and Injured

Kathy Dawson — Tue, 16 Mar 2010 17:09:51 +0000

Traveling with your mate can be challenging under good circumstances, but being far from home when your hurt or injured can really stretch your relationship. How do I know this? I just returned from 3 weeks away with my husband. The 3rd day into the trip I fell off a ramp and twisted and sprained both ankles and broke my left foot. I was essentially immobilized for the next few days and literally a drag for the rest of the trip. Let’s just say I pulled up the rear most of the time. I’m usually a chipper personality, but if I can’t move freely, I get crabby. My husband had the patience of a saint and was kind and understanding beyond most human capabilities. Just more proof (like I need more?) of how lucky I am.

We’re On the Same Team

Kathy Dawson — Sun, 21 Feb 2010 13:17:43 +0000

My husband and I have traveled together recently and nowhere does teamwork show up in our relationship more than when we have to get out of town together. We have different styles of organization, so it’s tough sometimes, especially when we are down to the wire to leave. I tend to be a last minute, “Oh lets pack this!” kind of person when my husband has been working off spreadsheets for a couple of weeks. But, somehow, we pull it off. His forward thinking and my by the seat of my pants approach come together to create a departure that works for us. So if you and your mate have different styles when it comes to travel planning, use them both and remember … you’re on the same team!

Great Couple!

Kathy Dawson — Wed, 17 Feb 2010 14:01:55 +0000

I filmed a news segment last week in preparation for Valentine’s Day. Included in the segment were Debbie and Maurice LaFond, a couple who has been married over 30 years and truly knows the secret of a successful lifelong relationship. Click the link below and listen to the wisdom of this couple who knows what it takes be happy and married.

http://www.wkyc.com/news/news_article.aspx?storyid=130827

Born To Be Cupid

Kathy Dawson — Mon, 15 Feb 2010 13:19:38 +0000

It’s my birthday today! I’m officially 53 years and 1 hour old and happier with each passing minute. If it were 53 years and 1 hour ago, and I had the ability to custom design my life, I couldn’t have created an existence any more wonderful than the one I’ve lived. Seriously. No matter what happens from this point on, I’ve got so much gratitude in the fuel tank that it will easily take me home.

I was born 7 hours and 2 minutes after Valentine’s Day, which always makes me smile and is no surprise to me. Ushered in with Valentine’s Day at my heels was clearly foreshadowing at its best. Love and its symbol of a red heart always flowed naturally into my birthday celebration, so that when as a freshman in high school, I was asked to choose a mythological character to portray for a unit on mythology, I naturally chose – you guessed it – Cupid. The feeling of standing dressed as Cupid wearing a sandwich board of a big red heart and holding a cardboard arrow will forever be branded into my memory.

So here I am. Fifty-three years old and I get to play Cupid every day of my life! Since I became a relationship coach 18 years ago, I’ve played rather than worked. My “job,” if you can even call it that, is to teach people how to love each other. Not a bad gig. Not a bad gig at all.

Big Turnout for 17th Annual Romance Workshop

Kathy Dawson — Mon, 08 Feb 2010 02:03:34 +0000

We had 28 couples attend this year’s Romance Workshop, even though some surrounding areas were slammed with almost a foot of snow the previous night. Thank you to everyone who braved the inclement weather! The new fallen snow was a perfect backdrop to a romantic day at The Hillbrook Club, a turn of the century English Tudor Mansion in Chagrin Falls, Ohio. Tucked inside acres of woods, this historic building showcased three fireplaces and countless romantic nooks and crannies to where couples retreated throughout the day. One of the highlights of the workshop was a presentation given by Kathleen Krupar, a licensed massage therapist, who taught everyone the benefits of touch, including 9 different kinds of hugs!